Five Things Good Friday

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Five Things Good Friday


We've been planting on the terrace -- dreaming of it someday being festooned with fragrant honeysuckle so that we might be constantly pestered by hummingbirdds. . . . 
1. The first thing I would have to say about Good Friday is that I will never feel entirely comfortable "being secular" on it. My Catholic background was a positive one in so many ways, with a deep and nourishing faith that goes back generations and that yes, was marred by strict rules and arcane, unrealistic notions of human sexuality and gender, but also which offered an ecclestical calendar full of practices that reassured and reinforced and worked with memory and aesthetics in powerful ways. So that for me, having left most of that behind over the last two decades or so, Good Friday is still suffused with its odd mixture of a Fasting/Fish Friday and the once-a-year excitement of my Dad's hot cross buns, which he'd begin making that morning and we'd be gobbling greedily by midday, having had a few hours to savour their sweet, spicy, yeasty fragrance as they rose and baked.... And the afternoon's answering fragrance of incense at the Veneration of the Cross. The solemnity of answering the priest's chant, "This is the Wood of the Cross," the nervous silliness as we reverently kissed the wood the purple covering had been carefully folded back to expose. My father's beautiful tenor exalting and exulting,  "Tantum Ergo" . . .

2. My dad's birthday occasionally fell on Good Friday, his birthday being April 15th. That always seemed fitting to me, as he was clearly a Good man, but I was always sympathetic that he couldn't celebrate as he deserved. His faith was such that it would never have seemed a sacrifice to him. A privilege, rather.

3. All that being true, today I will spend in secular and also celebratory fashion. At least, we're beginning it with a session with our trainer, and then later today our son, daughter-in-law, and granddaughter arrive for the Wedding Weekend, so all of ours will be in the same city for a change, all staying within two kilometres of each other. Tonight, we ten adults and five children will enliven a certain lucky restaurant for as long as the kids can stay relatively civilised. Before that, I hope we'll have some of the little ones running off steam at our place.

4. Tomorrow, on what would have been my dad's 90th birthday, we'll be together with my new son-in-law's family to witness and celebrate the formalising of a marriage that, in fact, has been doing well enough informally that we have a delightful granddaughter from it  (and some wonderful trips to Italy to boot). Can't wait to toast this family as they "pledge their troth" legally, and to wish them many happy years together.

5. On Sunday, my extended family gathers at my sister's where she hosts the annual Easter Egg Hunt and Brunch -- so much crazy fun with three generations of our sprawling crew. And then on Monday, we're hosting a Brunch/Open House here to let that same Big Extended Family greet and toast our newlyweds (and check out our new digs for the first time).  Wouldn't it be great if some sunshine might appear so that we could wander out on the terrace and admire some of our new plantings (I'll post about those later, for interested gardeners and potential gardeners and vicarious gardeners)? Rhetorical question, honestly, as there seems little chance of sunshine here in the land that Apollo and his chariot seem to have forgotten. . . .

So there you have it. A busy family weekend here, and I'm unlikely to post more before next Tuesday, so let me wish you all a Happy Easter! (and whisper how odd it feels to offer that on Good Friday, when my Catholic/Christian calendar bids me meditate on the sorrow and wonder of the cross). May you find some sunshine, some chocolate, perhaps a quiet moment for meditation, even solemnity. Goodness knows the world needs some of the latter as well. . . .


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